Broken Leader
by Turtle412
Summary: His brother's hurt - his fault. Leo had decided to go rogue, forgo his responsibilities. When she confronts him, will he be able to be the leader again, keep steadfast? Or will he act on his feelings? Leo x April. Some angst. Post-4x16 "Broken Foot".


" _You're supposed to be our leader."_

He sat hunched on his bed as her words replayed in his mind again. She'd been disappointed in him. He sighed. He couldn't blame her - he was ashamed of himself. He was the leader, the one Master Splinter had chosen to represent the family and uphold their honour.

But tonight he had not only failed his brothers, he'd led them into danger unknowingly. If he had trusted them, talked to them, let them in this wouldn't have happened. But no, he wilfully neglected his duty and in doing so set Donnie up for disaster.

 _Why?_ His head fell into his palms. He understood why he'd done it. There were several reasons. He liked not having to lead for a change, to be reckless, not have everyone look towards him for guidance. He wanted to hurt Shredder back, make him pay for all he'd done to him and his family. He thought he was helping the city by taking the fight to the underworld. He wanted to be with Karai; he wanted to see if there was any chance their old spark would rekindle, so his mind would be taking off _her_ ….that wound up being a futile hope. Instead his anger at being unable to bury those feelings only made him throw himself into the Rogue Foot Clan more.

He looked up to the ceiling. _Strong. Noble. Uncompromising. Selfless._ This was how others saw him, how his family looked at him. But Leo knew who he really was - he wasn't truly any of these things. He was flawed, he had his own desires, and tonight he'd shown just how imperfect he was.

He was suddenly woken from his thoughts when he heard a small knock on the door before it opened. It was April. Leo looked at her and tried to suppress a blush when he saw the way the light from outside reflected on her face, accentuating her features gorgeously.

"Hey" he weakly said. He internally cursed himself, " _Come on, get yourself together."_

"Leo, we still need to talk about tonight."

Leo suddenly felt more insecure and evasive, "I thought we already did, April."

He was weak, a coward - he realised that. But, he couldn't deal with this now. Having to go through it with her again. See her disappointment.

"Yeah but we're not done Leo. You're the leader, you can't just do stuff like this."

She looked down at him, her face a mix of pity and woe. He hated seeing her like this. It was worse known that he was the cause.

"I know April. I shouldn't have done it…"

"That's not good enough. You can't do things like this anymore. We need you-" His eyes widened as he waited for her to finish, "I need you."

Leo mustered all his strength in order to stay composed at her statement as she continued.

"I get that it must be hard…" She paused, trying to think about what she wanted to convey, "But it's true that we all need you. Raph and Casey need you to keep them balanced. Mikey needs you to keep him focused. Donnie needs you to keep him in touch. I need you to watch me train and help me when I go wrong. You're the one who always practices with me and teaches me. You're the one we depend on."

"April, you don't get it. The constant responsibility, it's suffocating. I know I was wrong but damn it, I just wanted a chance to cut loose and not have all that weight on my shoulders for a change."

She was taken aback at hearing him even lightly swear. He meanwhile calmed down a tad and was disgusted that he had just spoken like that to her.

"You're right Leo. You're probably the only one of us that can truly understand."

"Apr-"

"I didn't finish!" She had a hand on her hip and that determined, purpose-filled look in her eyes. Leo was absorbed by her. She looked so…. _sexy._ Leo turned his head to hide the bright blush that now adorned his face as he tried to push those sensual thoughts from his mind. Thankfully for Leo's dignity, despite her gaze, she didn't notice.

"Make someone… make me understand. Explain it to me. Talk to me. Don't burden it all by yourself. You do have a choice: you can try and carry it all by yourself, or you can let me help you."

She sat beside him on the bed as she finished. Leo knew she was only making a comforting, friendly gesture. Unfortunately, she only got the turtle more hot under the collar. He wasn't able for this now.

"R-Right. Thanks April. I'll take you up on that offer later."

She grimaced, that annoyance clearly visible in her gaze again.

"Don't brush me off Leo. I want you to be able to depend on me. I don't want you to keep going off and doing stupid stuff like this. We're a team, a family. This has to stop for everyone's sake, for Donnie's sake."

There it was - Donnie. The brother who had gotten hurt tonight due to him. The brother he had been betraying for a long time now. He wanted to scoff: it was fitting really. He had brought injury onto the brother whom loved the same girl as him.

" _It was freaking poetic_ " he darkly thought.

He hadn't noticed her inch closer to him. He was too caught up in his self-loathing. He noticed her out of the corner of his eye, causing his breath to catch. She placed her hand on his shoulder, leading to a tremor passing through his whole body. She was the only one who had this effect on him - _his beautiful goddess._ Leo gulped; April decided not to mention it.

"Remember whose window you came to the night you met Karai?"

A moment of silence passed, Leo not knowing how to answer. " _She still thinks I like Karai. What am I meant to say? I can't tell her the truth - Donnie's loved her longer."_

April spoke up again, taking his silence as a sign that he understood and knew the answer to her question.

"I get how you feel about Karai. But, you have to let it go. It's tearing the team apart; every time you obsess over her, put her above everyone else-"

To their mutual surprise, he chuckled tiredly. This obviously didn't go down too well with the red head.

"Oh I'm sorry Leo, are you finding something about this mess funny?!" She was fuming now, her glare could strike fear into Oroku Saki's black heart.

But at that moment Leo was bold. He didn't feel like backing down.

"I don't have feelings for Karai! It's not like that anymore between us, not since North Hampton…"

Leo's rational side suddenly took hold and he understood that he had said far too much.

"Wait, so you're telling me you don't like Karai?" She had stood up and took a step forward. "So what was this whole thing? I get being friends with her, but joining her instead of us when you don't want to be with her."

" _All I want is you."_

She was pacing a little...it was cute, Leonardo reckoned. A few strands of her hair had gotten loose, and were frayed along her face. It only made her even more attractive to the black-clad ninja. He focused on her scent, softly breathing it in. She was a mix of strawberries (her favorite shampoo) and tea leaves. It was so enticing. She always had such a pretty face but it really shone when she was thinking. " _Yep,_ _Donnie's_ _girl really is amazing."_

"Hold on" she said, having come upon a realisation. "Was this some sort of jealousy thing? Is there another person?"

Leo cursed under his breath. "Who else do I know? You know I'm not into guys and we only know a few girls."

"Well it's the only thing I can think of to explain why you'd do this. Leo you're better than making someone jealous."

"I wasn't trying to make her jealous!"

"So you admit you're attracted to someone new."

Leo flinched. He was slipping. "April, I can't be with this other girl. I was hoping being with Karai would make me have feelings for her again and forget the other girl. It didn't work, so it doesn't matter. I'll just handle it."

April looked at her feet and then stared at him. He struggled to maintain the eye contact.

"Leo, I want to help you. But you need to let me know. I just want you to trust me."

She turned to leave. Leo looked at her back for a second...he had forsaken so many of his rules tonight already.

"I'll let you know why I can't be with her." She could just barely look over her shoulder; he was behind her in an instant. He lightly grabbed her arm and softly turned her around to face him.

Before she could react, he placed a hand on her hip to pull her tight against him and brought his lips to hers.

God, the dozens of dreams Leo had experienced about this moment couldn't compare to the reality. He was in utter bliss. Their lips molded to each other perfectly. She tasted so delightfully sweet. When he'd started to kiss her, she'd stiffened...for a fraction of a second. She swiftly relaxed against him. April was melting in his arms. He knew he was doing a good job when she moaned into his mouth. Leo formed an uncharacteristic smirk - she was enjoying herself. Their tongues swirled around each other in a sloppy dance. Leo put all the rage, the sorrow, the regret, the passion he'd been feeling into the kiss. He had only one thing on his mind at that moment - to make April feel as good as possible.

After a few more minutes they were forced to disengage. April's lips were swollen and she was struggling to catch her breath. She kept her eyes fixed somewhat downward, on his chest, not quite able to look at his face after the moment they'd just had. Leo himself was also rather short of breath and had a dazed look in his eyes. He had really enjoyed that. His hands were resting lovingly on her shoulders while hers moved to his biceps.

They stayed like that, holding each other in tranquility for another few minutes. Leo couldn't will himself to move away from her. " _Just another minute"_ he kept thinking to himself. He knew this was the only time he could be like this with her, and darn him he didn't want it to end. He wanted to stay like this with her for as long as he could.

Eventually, Leo untangled himself from his red haired beauty. She looked at him with want and horror in her eyes.

"Leo, I-"

"I know, I'm sorry April. I shouldn't have done that... I just couldn't hold it in. I guess we can just add it to my list of failures lately." He flashed her the most pathetic attempt at a smile he'd ever made.

"You can't stay here at the lair all night, so I won't delay you from checking up on Donnie before you go. It's ok April. I'll get my head on straight and be the leader again. I won't ever mention this if you don't. You don't have to worry about me - I won't stop you and Donnie."

He had tried to sound as positive as he could.

April just kept looking at him in the same way. She couldn't form a sentence. She just weakly left his room and quietly shut his door.

….Unbeknownst to Leo, she'd just asked Raph to send Donnie her best and left the sewers immediately. All the way to the surface and most of the way home, she just keep twiddling her crystal between her fingers, deep in thought, a light cherry blush fixed on her cheeks.

Leo laid back on his bed in ignorance. He was team leader and he was going to be the standard his brothers could look up to once again. Come morning, he'd be the honourable son forever more. But it hadn't been all bad, a part of him thought as he traced a finger along his mouth. Yes, he had kissed the girl who wanted to be with his brother and vice-versa.

Yes, he'd finally kissed the _girl he loved._

Leo closed his eyes as he reflected on his night. He'd messed up, endangered his family's safety and his bond with them, and committed the ultimate betrayal against his brother. But, on that last detail, a part of him (a bigger part than he'd ever admit) was firm in the belief that _being the bad guy for the night was pretty nice._

 **Hope you all enjoyed this little fanfic. I've wanted to write for 2012 Leopril/Aprinardo for so long, they're one of my absolute favourite pairings ever. Add in Broken Foot being one of the show's best episodes & a great Leo episode and this little story was born in my mind. Please leave a review once you've read the story. It doesn't have to be profound and constructive criticism is welcome. It's just nice to get reviews. **

**And, in case I get asked this in the reviews, I'll clarify preemptively: in this fanfic, Leo got over his crush on Karai after Vengeance is Mine and fell in love with April at North Hampton once he woke up. Leo thinks April returns Donnie's feelings when in actuality she's loved Leo since Season 2.**

 **Thanks again for reading!**


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